He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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