What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
