Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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