just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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