The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
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