My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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