When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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