Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
