I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
