You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
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Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
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I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
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