It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take back everything I said about communal showers
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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