hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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