It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
