new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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