he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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