Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
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