It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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