I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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