well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
