Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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