Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
