k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
