i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
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