But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I hope mine doesn't look like that
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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