can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
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