Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
