Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?