I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I am available for nakedness
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize