i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize
