I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
My life is pants optional.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
