He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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