I think my vagina is haunted
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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