They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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