ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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