is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like iHOP with fire
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize