David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Randomize
