Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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