hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
