Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
I have post one night stand depression
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Randomize
