We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
