We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
