she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
My ass is underappreciated
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
