it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I think your dad took our porno
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
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