Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
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