all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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