Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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