The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
