He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize
