how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
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I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
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Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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