The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
